


I hope that she Looks at me and thinks "shit, he's so pretty

by catboy_quackity



Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Anxiety Disorder, Anxious Ranboo, Bisexual Ranboo, Dogs, Fluff and Angst, Good Friend Toby Smith | Tubbo, Insecurity, Nightmares, Platonic Cuddling, Ranboo Angst (Video Blogging RPF), Trans Toby Smith | Tubbo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-13
Updated: 2021-01-16
Packaged: 2021-03-17 17:34:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,290
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28728960
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/catboy_quackity/pseuds/catboy_quackity
Summary: ranboo is anxious about meeting up with tubbo , which is happening in a week and that might make ranboo pass out on its own . hes sure tubbo is lovely but that voice nags in the back of his head that maybe tubbo wont like him .when tubbo gets there , hes going to hold onto ranboo so tightly that the taller will feel the squeeze for hours .
Relationships: Ranboo & Toby Smith | Tubbo
Comments: 23
Kudos: 336





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> lowercase is very intended !! 
> 
> title is from juliet by cavetown :]
> 
> also i hope this doesnt come off as a weird ranboo and tubbo fic , im just sad and this is my way of doing it !! 
> 
> but if it comes off as romantic , i aint mean it like that ,,, dont be weird 
> 
> also fully self indulgent !! ranboo isnt bi but i am , i also think i am ugly as heck and need kind words from tubbo underscore
> 
> also !! ranboo has two lovely mothers who will br showing up !! soon !!

Ranboo had been nervous , rightfully so because Tubbo wanted to see his face and Ranboo has never been good with his face , he's always been insecure about his face but , he trust tubbo . 

tubbo had been encouraging , even saying tubbo didn't have to see and that it could be a beautiful surprise . Ranboo wanted to do this for tubbo , wanted to give tubbo this important piece of ranboo. 

" it really is fine ranboo , i get not wanting to show me youre face ," tubbo sounded so soft that it made him want to show tubbo more . 

" i wanna show you ," ranboo took a deep breath , his anxiety swelling , he knows tubbo will see his face soon but , that didnt stop his heart pounding noisily in his chest , " you mean a lot to me , i just wanna ... ," ranboo sighed heavily .

tubbo almost went on another spiel but , ranboo turned his camera on , his face showing up next to tubbos . he had stopped as he got closer to his computer screen . ranboo wanted to turn it back off , tubbo had been looking at him for awhile and he had started getting itchy , worrying about tubbo finding every flaw that ranboo had .

ranboo had spent hours before picking out small things about his appearance , the tiny scar on his eyebrow , his hair hadnt been done before too woried about this , his nose didnt match his face , too big on his slim face , his pupils were blown wide which didnt match the bags under his eyes . ranboo had noticed when he played with his hoodie sleeves , pulling his arms out and letting them sit in his lap .

ranboo almost turned his camera back off , his hand shakily going to the mouse . ranboo's hand stopped as tubbos mic picked up his breath hitch , he got close to the microphone and ranboos sure his senestivity was turned high .

" ranboo ," tubbo sounded small , "you are ... ," he stopped again, bringing his hand up to move his long bangs from his eyes . 

" im sorry , i dont look how you think right ? i get it if you dont think im attractive or whatever , i am not good lookin' so i get it completely ," ranboo wanted to ramble more but tubbo spoke softly to cut through his anxious talking .

" you are beautiful ranboo , who told you that you werent ?" tubbo sounded so out of breath , he looked flushed as he finally looked into his camera smiling , " you really are like ... " tubbo shrugged as he looked back at his screen , staring at ranboo again , " beautiful , breathtaking , pretty , cute , other things ," tubbo finished , nodding as he took a drink from a nearby water bottle, turning his head which gave ranboo a breather .

" thank you tubs ," ranboo sat back in his chair, taking deep breaths , putting his hand near his dogs face , said dog licking his hand . ranboo let his eyes flutter close , focusing on calming down as tubbo shuffled around on his side .

" when we meet up ran , im going to hold you so hard ," tubbos voice sounded cackly over discord , "your never gonna leave my hugs ran ," ranboo laughed gently as he opened his eyes, smiling at tubbo who smiled back , that was the first time tubbo saw his toothy smile.

" i love your smile ," tubbo got closer , ranboo couldnt help his smile get bigger , " do you have dimples ?" tubbo asked as he sat back , scratching his service dogs face .

" thats the cutest fuckin' thing ive seen all day ," tubbo mumbled , ranboo still heard him with a soft smile .

tubbo made sure to compliment every little thing he saw ranboo do , smiling brightly as ranboo would look away or focus on something different like , chewing his lip or petting something in his lap .

tubbo couldnt wait to hold ranboo in his arms , he cant wait to see ranboo get all pink at small compliments as tubbo held his face , tubbo watched as ranboo played with his sleeves or look at what tubbo thinks is a window as the light hit him just right . 

that night when ranboo had to get off to eat lunch and it grew very late for tubbo , he held an old stuffed teddy bear and pretended it was ranboo , so excited to meet one of his best friends .


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> they do some things like room tour , watch a movie , cuddle , nightmare , watch frozen 2 , sleep

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hnng i hope this is good !! again platonic , i hope i didnt write it that way
> 
> also
> 
> ranboos mom is a short lady with blonde hair , ranboos mother is a tall lady with black hair, other than that , imagine them as you want :]

ranboo had been nervous all day , pacing around his apartment and fixing small things , tubbo would be brought home by his mother who would pick him up as she drove home from work to the airport .

his other mom had went to the store , picking up snacks for the two boys , tubbo's eldest sister would be coming because of how long tubbo would be staying .

right now , ranboo was in their living room , his dog not to far behind as ranboo kept adjusting small things . ranboo is sure he stood in the archway that exposed their kitchen to their living room for about 10 minutes , he'd forgotten the reason at about 5 minutes . 

ranboo stared at his pride flag in his room for another 15 minutes , he should take it down . no that's dumb , he argued to no one but himself . tubbo wouldnt care , why would tubbo care about a small fact about ranboo .

at some point ranboo forced himself from his room and down the hall to the living room . he stood there for awhile just thinking , over thinking to be more specific .

ranboo is terrified for how long tubbo would be staying , an entire week where they could do nothing but be with each other . what if tubbo didnt like ranboo and went home early , the long airplane ride would be worthless and ranboo would be to blame . 

the front door of their apartment opened and ranboos breath caught in his throat as he looked behind him , oh , it was just his mom with bags . ranboo rushed over and took some of the bags , his mom laughing softly as her nervous son rushed to the kitchen .

" mr. boo ," she called out as she walked into the kitchen from the living room , smiling softly at him , " dont be nervous , im sure tubbo will love you ," she reassured , ranboo watched as his mom put away other food as she softly hit a bag with her foot , "thats for you and tubbo ," 

ranboo nodded as he picked up the bag , shuffling around as he watched his mom closely .

"yes ranboo , do you need something ," she asked as she cupped his face with one hand , she looked concerned as she got closer , waiting for ranboo to respond .

" im just worried ," ranboo said simply , his brain couldnt make the words to explain why , thats all he had to say as his moms face softened and she came closer . ranboos mom was alot shorter than ranboo which made it kinda funny looking when she cupped his face fully to bring him down closer to her height .

" ive only had one conversation with tubbo and im 100 percent sure , nothing bad will happen this week with him ," his moms voice was soft as she softly rubbed at his cheek with her thumb , " everything will be alright , i promise you ranboo ," 

ranboo nodded as his mom leaned forward and pressed a kiss to his forehead , " your mother will be home soon , just take a few deep breaths ,"

ranboo did just that as he stood up , " oh , and i love you ," he watched his mom go back to what she was doing , humming softly .

" love you too ,"

\---

when ranboo walked out of his room , he hadnt heard the front door open . one of the things he didnt expect was someone to be hugging him , causing him to stumble back . he could hear the sound of his moms laughter as ranboo wrapped his arms around someone .

than it hit him all at once , brown hair and giggling that hes heard so many times during late calls . ranboo shoved his face into tubbos hair , muffled laugher filling the area .

" hello ranboo ," tubbos voice was muffled in his chest , ranboo pushed tubbo away to look at him , " its so weird in america ," his eyes were wide as he looked up at ranboo .

" seems about right ," ranboo joked as he ran his fingers through his hair , smiling down at him .

" wanna go to my room ?" ranboo suggested as he fully pulled away from tubbo , glancing up to his mom and mother , they smiled at him as his mother started a conversation with tubbos sister . 

tubbo nodded as he looked around than at ranboo , smiling at him as ranboo grabbed his hand and lead him to his room , closing the door behind the older as he spun around in place to take in ranboos room .

" your rooms pretty cool ," ranboo turned towards tubbo who was looking at the bisexual flag that hung above his bed that was pressed agasint the wall left of the door .

" thats cool , w-what country is that ?" tubbo asked as he turned towards ranboo , he looked confused when ranboo stared stiffiling his laugh .

" dont laugh at me ! i wanna know , is it super obvious ?" tubbo looked back at the flag , tilting his head .

than it seemed to click as he turned back to ranboo , he looked down and covered his face as he groaned loudly .

" its fine tubbo , really ," 

" 'm so dumb ," tubbos voice was muffled into his hands as he plopped into the bed .

ranboo laughed into his hand as he sat next to tubbo , putting his free hand on tubbos arm as tubbo let his hands fall from his face .

" lets pretend that didnt happen ," tubbo stammered out as he turned to ranboo , his face still red from embarrassment , " are you -" tubbo pointed at the flag than at ranboo .

" mhm , im bi ," ranboo nodded , trying to hide his nervousness as he played with his hands .

" thats cool , yknow same ," tubbos face scrunched up as ranboo cocked his head , confused , " wait no , im trans ," 

" thank you for tellin -"

" ranboo , you kinda came out to me first ," tubbo pointed , giggling as ranboo nodded .

this was going to be a fun week , ranboo thought as he pushed tubbo away playfully .

" anyways ,"

\----

some time had passed as the two got used to being with each other , ranboo had to get used to being seen and not being able to hide his smile or muffle his laugh without tubbo batting his hand away or throwing a general fit. 

they had already eaten dinner and right now , they were sitting on ranboos bed , laptop playing Aladdin . at some point , tubbo had leaned back into ranboo , yawning and wiping at his face . ranboo started to run his hands through the others hair , scratching at his scalp .

" im so ready to pass out ran ," tubbo shuffled around , stretching and kicking the computer out of his way .

" ah , watch out ," ranboo sat up and grabbed the computer , moving it out of the way of tubbos legs . 

tubbo moved around until they were both laying down , cuddling close to ranboo .

tubbo had fallen asleep at the 30 minute mark , tubbos face was stuffed into ranboos chest and ranboo was on verge of passing out .

ranboo ran his hands through tubbos hair , barely paying attention to Aladdin as his eyes fluttered closed .

\---

tubbo was woken up by mumbling from ranboo , the other had moved away from him and when tubbo sat up to look down at him , he was shaking .

" ranboo ?" tubbo called out softly as he placed a hand to shake him gently , " ranboo are you okay ?" tubbo asked as ranboo whined in his sleep .

" ranboo , get up ," ranboo gasped awake , hitting away tubbo as he almost fall off the bed .

" ran just breathe , youll be okay ," tubbo sat near him , his hands hovering over ranboo as the sound of laboured breathing and soft words filled the room .

ranboos breathing had calmed down as he grabbed onto tubbo , bringing him into his lap , hugging him tightly .

" what happened ?" tubbo asked as he squeezed him , his voice muffled into ranboos chest before he turned his head , pressing his ear to his chest , hearing his fast heartbeat .

" bad dream tubs ," ranboo sniffled , his voice was tiny .

" oh , d'you wanna talk about it ? " tubbo asked as he rubbed at his back , the cool air from a window that was left open blew past them , causing tubbo to shiver .

" not really ," came ranboos small voice and tubbo nodded as he tried to shuffle out of ranboos grasp .

" ill be back ," tubbo didnt go far as he grabbed the laptop that had been closed and shuffled back to ranboo , placing the laptop between them and playing frozen 2 , a movie they talked about watching forever ago on stream .

" do you need somethin' ran ?" tubbo looked up at him , watching him in case anything changed .

" 'm fine ,"

" i can go get you water ," tubbo started getting back up , ready to climb out of bed so he could come back to him quicker .

" can you just stay with me ?" ranboos voice was tiny and watery , he sounded on the verge of tears and who was tubbo to leave him alone again .

tubbo nodded as he wrapped his arms around ranboos torso , bringing him close . ranboo laid them both down , tubbos head resting on ranboos chest . they were elevated by ranboos abundant amount of pillows .

tubbo could hear his slowing heart beat , ranboos hands running through his hair as he put his face into his hair .

" 'm sorry -"

" dont finish that ran , dont feel sorry ," tubbo sat up to look at him , " its okay , its fine really ," tubbo smiled softly at him as ranboo nodded , laying back down .

as they watched the movie , ranboo had fallen back asleep , tubbo had almost fell back to sleep , closing the laptop with his leg .

" g'night ran ," 

" 'night 'ubbo ,"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope this doesnt seemed rushed , let me know if you guys want more chapters about their whole week and maybe ideas !!


End file.
